


A Very Strange Time Of My Life

by TheTeaLeaf



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, M/M, Reincarnation, eren/levi - Freeform, i wrote it in just one session so i apologize for eventual errors, just a little thing i came up with
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-26
Updated: 2016-01-26
Packaged: 2018-05-16 11:36:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5827168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTeaLeaf/pseuds/TheTeaLeaf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This time you just met me at a very strange time of my life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Very Strange Time Of My Life

-We’re starting to lose it, you know?

 

My chuckle is low, raspy, it scrapes against my sternum. –Why do you say so? We did it again, after all.

 

He laughs too, eyes glimmering with an intoxicating mixture of tenderness and bitterness. That is a constant, I have noticed it just now: the way his eyes watch me, regardless of where –or when- we are, it’s never changed. That faint trace of furious blues, the one that carries the darkest shade of those impossible green eyes, always staying quietly in the back. Well, most of the time quietly. In the past, I can vaguely remember one or two times when he came to blows eventually. _Brat_.

 

-But it took us _25 years_. Usually we managed to do it in what, four years top?- He sighs, his crooked grin brightening his tanned face, moving so he can sit closer to me. –We’re getting old. My bones aren’t as young as the first times, I feel the weft of reality slowly falling apart from my colder and colder hands…

 

I manage to kick him in the hip with my foot, smirking –Cut the crap and the big words, you can barely read the fucking restaurant menu all alone!

 

He grasps his white tee in a very melodramatically way, his annoyingly beautiful face scrunching up in a hurt grimace. –Why you must hurt me this way? I have feelings! You are a horrible human being, I hope your midget self is aware of this!

 

This costs him a second kick. He pats my leg to calm me, resting his hand on my calf after. The sunset sunlight coming from the window makes his skin almost honey colored. He is indeed beautiful. I’ve been more than lucky in my opinion to have him as my match: how is that I, brusque and cold and grumpy, have come to deserve someone like him? What have I possibly done? Because even if it was meant to be a punishment it’d be no sense: his presence can only be a blessing in someone’s life.

 

-By the way, what’s your name this time?- he asks, looking me in the eyes.

 

-Levi.

 

-Levi,- he repeats, making it rolls on his tongue to see how it sounds. He clicks his tongue and gives me a broad smile –I like it. It fits you. And I think there will never be a chance to get a worse name than that time in the Flanders!

 

-Don’t remind me of that, still trying to forget everything about it!

 

I laugh again but it quickly escalates in a coughing fit. He immediately scoots closer to me and helps me to lean with my back straight against the pillows. When it ends, his right hand remains on my chest, above my heart. I know he can feel the bones under the thin layer of pale skin but all the coughing drained me out too much to try driving him away. After a moment he raises it to cup my gaunt cheek, his thumb sliding slowly over my cheekbone. I lean into the touch closing my eyes, struggling to regain a regular breath. His hand is warm against my cold body, underlining even more the fact that I’m not-so-slowly-anymore sliding away from him again.

 

-It’s Eren, for me. Not that bad, I have to say. Not my favourite so far but it’s okay I guess…- he murmurs, resting his forehead against mine. He takes my hand and brings it to his chest, breathing slowly in and out to help me. My pale hand looks utterly ridiculous compared to his: mine are small, marked with the intricate, blue twist of my veins that runs up my arms, just below the skin as marker signs; his are big and soft and caring. He may be a little clumsy but when he holds me with those hands it feels as we have been created just for that specific moment, as if all the struggles and frustrations had as their final target that precise second.

 

-You think you going to let go of my hand?

 

He smiles but it’s a dry one –I won’t be able to do it for a quite a lot so… I think I won’t for now.

 

-You have to let go sooner or later. You have not the privilege of choosing, I’m sorry.

 

He straightens his back to look me in the eyes, his face right in front of mine. His eyes are already swimming with tears, the first one rolling down his cheek.

 

-What if I don’t? What if I declare, right now, I state that this is my fucking choice and I won’t let go? What can they do?- he says angrily, his tone marked with pain.

 

-There are some things we can’t control and we must accept them this way. We have no option,- I reply, brushing some of his messy bangs from his forehead.

 

-What if it hurts too much to let go, to accept them? _Why does it have to hurt this way?_

 

-Pain is relative,- I sigh, fixing the grey bandana on my head, my fingers trembling as I do. I don’t have the force to do even the simplest things these days. –It went this way, this time you just met me at a very strange time of my life.

 

His eyebrows furrow, looking at me for a second before letting his head fall on his chest and chuckling.

 

-You only can quote me _Fight Club_ in a moment like this. _Nerd._

 

I lean against him, my head in the crook of his neck.

 

-But it’s true, though. As I said before, pain is relative. Next time it’ll be me. It’s a cycle we can’t escape, although I would avoid it too.

 

He sniffles as he hesitantly puts his arms around me and squeezes my thin body against his.

 

-I know. But it still hurts. I ask for an hour, just another hour. Is it too much to ask for?

 

I untangle myself from the hug and look at him, raising a hand to dry his damp cheeks.

 

-We’ll have plenty of time in the future. All the lifetimes we can ask for.

 

-I would be happy just with one, to be honest, as long as I’m with you.

 

-That was sappy.

 

-You love when I do the sappy little shit!- he grins.

 

I let pass a dozen of seconds before leaning towards and placing my lips on his. It’s a simple kiss, just lips on lips, it’s a kiss for us and us only: it’s a simple kiss with the memories of countless lifetimes, _our_ lifetimes, in it. A reminder for all the ones that have yet to come.

When we part, the only sounds filling the air are the rhythmic beeping of my heart beat on the screen and the chatter in the hospital corridor.

 

-Where do you think we’ll meet next time? I’d like somewhere exotic for once!- he says, gently stroking my hands.

 

-I guess everywhere is fine, I don’t mind as long as I’m with you.

 

-Oi, get your own lines, cheese ball.

 

We stay like that for I don’t even know how much, looking at each other. Eventually I just know that my back hurts and tiredness is falling all over me.

 

-I think it’s time for you to go, Eren.

 

He takes me in his arms one more time, gulping down the sobs that tries to escape his mouth. I wrap my skinny arms around him, grasping at his sweatshirt. _You have to be strong, Eren. Do it for me. Promise me you’ll be strong._ He kisses me on the forehead before standing up and putting on his jacket. His movements are stiff, his hands are shaking. I would jump off this fucking bed and go to him this very second if I had the strength.

He heads for the door, stopping with his hand on the door frame and turning towards me.

 

-So, see you later. Wherever and whenever it’ll be.

 

-Yeah. See you later.

 

He swallows hard and blinks a couple of times to get rid of the tears in his eyes before talking again.

 

-Will you wait for me?

 

I smile.

 

 –You were always worth the waiting.

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'M NOT SORRY  
> Thank you for reading ^^  
> Comments are always appreciated!


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